Inspiration & News



Peace within yourself

"People meausre their esteem of each other by what each has, and not by what each is......  Nothing can bring you peace but yourself."

                                   - Ralph Waldo Emerson, Self-Reliance


Deep water meditation my new fad?

I wonder if I may have just invented Deep Water Meditation...  Wait hold on I am going to Google this...

I am going to give myself credit for it. (okay I know that people do this as a sport and many say they go into a "Trace/Meditative" type state - but mine is moving into a different area away from a sport per say)

So for the September long weekend Mike, the beasts (Moka & Mojo) and I went camping with FLo, Charlie, Jess and her new beau Andy.  We headed out to Canyon Hot Springs Resort.  Situated between Glacier and Mount Revelstoke National Parks this campground was extremely nice.

For some reason the campground wasn't packed for a long weekend which was GREAT for us.  We had our own little area without any other campers near by.  The highlight of the resort was the HOT SPRINGS!!  OMG!!  They were so RELAXING!!!  There are two pools.  One that is just perfect and warm and the other is HOT boil me alive goodness.

During our time there I was so relaxed from the warm soothing water.  I decided to try a brief (for obvious reasons) mindful meditation under the water.

No the first issue I had is that I just kept floating up......  Wait I thought "Mike is sitting on the edge with his feet in the water.... I can use his feet!!".  So I went into seated mediation under Mike's feet (to hold me down) in the water.

If I felt the fear or that panic like "OMG!! I can't breathe!!", I would put my focus back to the calmness of the water.  How peaceful and relaxing it was both physically on my body but also the sounds.

Of course these "Mini" Meditations.  So more of the moment of awareness, which I consider just as, if not  much more important.  I was aware of when I felt like panicking, when I could just hear the waves over me in the pool, the warm water almost hugging me.  I was fully aware.

I wasn't down for very long at all maybe 30 seconds 3 or 4 times but I remember how these little moments felt more than the rest of the weekend.   I think these moments of awareness are so important in our daily lives.  We become so absorbed in everything our work, family, phone, emails and the door that we don't take a moment to center, bring perspective and clear the mind so you can have a memorable part of the day. 

I know I have had many wasted days.  With practice I know there will be fewer and fewer of those. All I really want to do now is go into seat meditation under the water.  I don't know what the local life guard would think if Mike was holding me under water with his feet at the pool.  Maybe we should try it and see?


The end of one life and the begining of another??

So Mike (my husband) started Nerds On Site as a Self Employeed IT Contractor back in 2005.  By 2006 he had his "Nerd Mobile" (Beetle).

Now we have loved that Nerd Mobile and for so many reasons:


*Great mileage averaging 900km/tank

*Standard!!  Which is supper sweet

*Diesel Engine


*Has helpped Mike become very successful in his business

*It has taken us on many road trips


We of course have had many little issues like the City of Calgary having a huge whole in the middle of the road which ended up with our car in the shop for a number of months, we have replaced the transmission, tires almost evey part at some point.

Finally this year our lease was up and we bought it out.  (our payments are insanely low - which is always good).

Now the one thing I haven't mentioned Diesel Beetles are no longer available, and why is that important?

Well a couple of weeks ago, just after Mike replaced the tires and had the breaks checked.  He rearended a truck at 10 KM/hour (the breaks wouldn't stop - of course?!? WTF???)  It was so bad the air bags didn't even go off - so obviously not a bad accident at all!!  He ended up hitting a metal bumper on a truck and it destroyed his hood.

So waiting and waiting to hear back about the car and as of today it is offically being written off.  For anyone else this really wouldn't be a big deal - since you can always get a new one...

Well not for us.  We can't get another Beetle like the one we owned, as I said Diesels are no longer being made with the Beetle body, and to add to that the gas models don't get anywhere near the mileage Mike had been getting. 

So now we don't have a beetle, our options suck and it is going to cost us at least $300 more per month in a new loan and fuel costs!!  Not to mention we had just put new tires on the nerdmobile, if we want those back we have to buy some crappy old ones to replace them so we can take our new ones.....

I feel like crying.   How can one little (barely an) accident lead to all of this?  We now have so many extra costs, I think I might actually need to find a job!!! I suppose this is the end of one life and maybe a begining of a new one if we don't end up broke and on the streets (of Amsterdam*) in the mean time.....

I think I need to go and do some yoga and deep meditation, as I know I am not centered at all..... A test to the begining of a new life stage.

*Referenece to the trip we are talking this fall no matter what!!


Moving up and Moving on 

I know it has been a while since I posted anything in my journal.  I have been struggling with what I really want to do in my life.

Being self employeed is one big aspect that I really wanted in my life and I love Aloette products, giving make-overs, meeting new people, providing superiour skin care products and working on my own schedule, but it isn't the only thing I really want to do.

I have talked a lot about wanting to become a certified Yoga Instructor for years now. 

My #1 problem has been timing.  It is hard to commit to a month of straight training, the costs are enourmous.  So I would not only have to take time off without being paid, many of the courses include traveling and staying away from home for an extended period of time.   So this dream has been pushed aside, over and over...... 

I have been drawn to yoga for many many reasons.  The health benefits are awesome as anyone who has tried or regularily practices would say, but the meditation, calmness and life style is what I really want to increase in my life and pass on to others.  I have always been a natural born leader, even when I haven't wanted to be one.  I think it is due to the fact I am the oldest of four children in my family.

I had been feeling a little like I have hit a midlife crisis (and I am only 28) for the last month or so. So what do you do when you feel like you hit a wall?  Change your life, I suppose.

So I got online and started looking up Yoga instructor training.....

(This was extremely hard to do I was in heels on uneven rock - I think I rocked the pose with all of that in consideration)

Sometimes timing works out in your favour and I found a 200 hour Yoga Teacher training combo levels 1, 2 and 3.  Happens over 9 weekends starting in January 2011 and it is 1 Weekend a month for 9 months, based in Calgary!!  This was an awaking of awesomeness!! It solved all my problems I had that had stopped me from getting certified.

The next step is to register!!  I am so excited.  I am finally going forward with my 1 passion I have wanted to follow but never had the opportunity too.

Stay tuned as I start my course in the next few months.


Concentration & Mindfulness = Wisdom

But concentration practice, however strong and satisfying, is incomplete without mindfulness to complement and deepen it.  By itself, it resembles a state of withdrawal from the world.  Its characteristic energy is closed rather than open, absorbed rather than available, tracelike rather than fully awake.  What is missing is the energy of curisotiy, inquiry, investigation, openness, availability, engagement with full range of phenomena experienced by human beings.  This is the domain of mindfulness practice, in which onepointedness and the ability to bring calmness and stability of mind into and understanding the  interconnectedness of a wide range of life experiences.

Concentration can be of great value, but it can also be seriously limiting if you become seduced by the pleasant quality of this inner experience and come to see it as a refuge from life in an unpleasant and unsatisfactory world.  You might be tempted to avoid the messiness of daily living for the tranquility of stillness and peacefulness.  This of course would be an attachment to stillness, and like any strong attachment, it can lead to delusion.  It arrests the development and short-circuits the cultivation of wisdom.

Page 74, "Wherever you go there you are - mindfulness meditation in everyday living", by  Jon Kabat-Zinn